I’ve noticed something since I came to teach in China. My work hours were long, the location a step down from London, and the internet was often one step above dial-up. But, I have not been this happy in a while.
I was puzzling a little over this because my work days are 12 hours at the minimum, from my first official class to the time I stop preparing for the next day’s lessons, it often approaches 14 hours. The city I’m in is a small one outside Beijing, the most exciting thing being a mall made to look like Italy. My internet won’t load the usual websites I would get back in Canada due to either the VPN or the speed, and downloading a youtube video is questionable at times. From the outside looking in, I should be pretty unhappy here.
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| On one hand: this fog is likely 50% pollution, on the other hand: the school sign is now disco lights! |
Yet, I haven’t been this content with where I am and what I’m doing since I started working.
From talking to friends and acquaintances similar to me in age, there’s a big focus on doing what you love as a job/career. If you do what you love, then your job comes to define you. I’ve personally struggled with even defining what it is that I like never mind what I love. There’s also the persistent anxiety that if I’m supposed to do what I love, and my job defines me, if I do anything that’s deemed less* then I am less. It was starting to increase my negative thoughts about what I’m doing with my life, my measure of success, and if I’m failing at adulthood.
I’m writing this post to remind myself, and perhaps you, that there are a lot of ways to feel happy and successful with your job, not all of which are directly related to what you do for work. Take stock of the parts of it that does give you joy and maybe you’ll realize you love your life even if you don’t love your job.
Working with people you like
My colleagues are great human beings. I laugh and laugh and laugh when we’re together and the kids get such a kick out of their teachers playing pranks on each other. All the staff regularly go out for dinner together and plan trips to Beijing. It’s rare that work friends can be friends after hours and I’m lucky to have it.
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| The National Chinese Theatre can only be entered through an underwater entrance. |
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| Mulan Ballet with my colleagues during the last break. |
Do work that makes others happy
I have fun in class every day and I see that students are enjoying their time in lessons. Waking up at 6 every day feels pretty crap but it’s hard to be in a bad mood once I start saying hi to kids in the hallways. Their mood is infectious and I do my best to remember that more than anything else, everyone wants to have a good class.
Prioritize what is important
My hours are long but there is enough time to do the things I care about if I prioritize them and use my work hours well. My weekends are free, and I make time for hobbies even if it’s only an hour every day. It’s not without sacrifice but when I do the things I feel are important, the sacrifices seem less meaningful. Two circumstances to note: I’m in another new curriculum so it will always be difficult initially but it’s temporary pain.
Recognize how damn lucky I am
Hedonistic adaptation says that your happiness level quickly adapts to any major moves up or down. Meaning, even if you objectively have a great life you might not feel that way subjectively. I counter this by having a weekly wrap-up post listing all the good things I experienced that week so my brain doesn’t forget. Every once in a while I also step back and think about the things that I take for granted (then slap myself for being whiney). My health, my finances, my ability to speak English and holding Canadian citizenship are all huge privileges.
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| Waking up earlier than my circadian rhythm wants to do doesn’t feel great, but seeing the sunrise every morning does feel pretty awesome. |
Are the things I’m unsatisfied with all that bad or just mild inconveniences? I’ve written weekly “This week in teaching” posts and in hindsight, the bad things just seem so inconsequential. Today, the worst thing that happened was the popups on my virus-infected classroom computer were back. That barely registers on the scale of truly bad things that could have potentially happened. The sacrifices I’m making right now won’t be forever, and they are so I can gain experience/money** for my future self.
Add fun to your work
A job does take up 1/2 of my waking hours so I do try to add some silliness into my day. In London, I once photocopied my face, put it in an official-looking envelope and had it delivered to my colleague and told them it was important news. Another time, I went to the science office and gift wrapped all the water bottles I could find. Find something fun and not harmful to do at work, and even better if you find a person who shares a similar sense of humour and would enjoy harmless pranks.
Strengthen existing relationships
I would be nowhere near as happy if I haven’t kept in touch with friends back in Canada and the UK. Talking to them and being updated on their lives keeps me grounded and reminds me that no matter how my week went they are still there. When I feel particularly crap I remember that my friends still love me, my family cares about me, and I matter to people who don’t give a shit what my job is.
I guess the cheesy thing I’m saying is, my job doesn’t make me happy, I make myself happy 🙂
*Whatever society has come up at that point to mean less.
**I also have this wild plan to retire in my 30s. More on that later.